Why is client management hard?
This is an edited transcript of Episode 013 of Design, In Confidence, mindfulness & design podcast with Stefano Bellucci Sessa’s learnings on creative confidence, emotional intelligence, and mental health.
As a freelance designer and innovation consultant, in confidence, I’ve found my clients frustrating at times:
- it’s not clear what they need
- they have unrealistic expectations
- they give feedback without valuing the work done.
When this happens, I can hear a voice in my head like Palpatine (Darth Sidious) from Star Wars.
Gooooood…. I can feel your…. hunger.
The client…. must be blamed
But later in my career, I understood I was the problem.
Yes, there were some “bad clients”. But I was also a “bad designer”.
Or better, most times we were all just doing our best.
Keep listening to understand how mindfulness and design help me build better relationships with clients and manage my mental health.
Client management is not easy.
We should accept this. After, we realise that we’ve been blaming clients and, most of all, lacking empathy towards them: seeing them as bad clients instead of someone with needs.
Clients usually have:
- limited time
- different expertise
- big opinion about the design
Which is… fair enough. They have a bigger stake in the success of the project. This should be obvious, but from what I see on many memes and discussions on online design communities, it isn't.
If you are a designer picturing the client as “someone evil” ready to destroy “your” design, you are wrong.
It’s not “your” design – it’s “theirs”.
If you don’t like this, you should be an artist, not a designer.
As a designer, you might be an expert on fonts, interactions, innovation, colours.
But the client is the main stakeholder and a better expert of the business, its past, and its future. However, they lack the time, expertise and mindset to make the best out of it.
That’s why they need you.
Be a proud and confident designer, but also humble.
Your expertise don’t make you better than the client, but different. And because you provide a service to them, you should bridge the time/expertise/mindset gap they have.
You should give them the tools and the knowledge to understand and be critical of what you’re doing in a constructive way.
Let’s look at this more in detail.
Including clients in the design process
Explain the why and the how of the design decisions to help them understand, contribute and see the value in the design.
Help them see why you expect a good impact.
But don’t expect them to have your criteria unless you agreed on them at the beginning of the project.
If they disagree with you:
- humble up: you might be wrong and you have to review your decisions
- be patient: you might be right, but they might need more time and information to understand it
No matter who is right, you need to accept that it will always be the client’s decision — it’s their business or project, not yours.
If great leaders, your clients might fullying delegate decisions to you – which is great… but:
how are you really so confident about your client’s business to make important decisions without including them at all?
To me, you’d sound like a doctor giving me a diet without knowing what food I like, how much I exercise, not knowing what food is affordable to me.
If you have that confidence, let me know how you do it.
If you don’t, let’s see how to include your client.
Explain to the client how you make trustworthy design decisions
Design is about making choices and compromises. Don’t show only the options that you’re going for, but also the options that you are excluding and make sure they understand what compromises you are making.
Keep them in the loop
Understand how often it should happen, because every project and client is different. Sometimes taking big leaps forward on your own it’s ok; other times the client should be part of every step.
Facilitate how the client can provide their input
Remember that the client has limited time, so help them focus and use their time, by clarifying:
- why you are asking their time
To make them aware of your decisions? include them in your decisions? make decisions? - what input is required
A choice between options? more options? feedback? more knowledge? - how they should share their input
Immediately or later? Formally or informally? Randomly or mindfully? - what are the consequences of their input
Your job will always be helping your client make informed decisions — also those delegated to you, which you “inform” by nurturing trust.
Check if there is a Palpatine in your head if you think the client is the only one contributing to the problem. And humble up and start collaborating.
And what if you tried all this, and the client is the problem?
When the client is the problem
Problematic clients means even more facilitating their input, keeping them in the loop and working on communication.
This is ok, but make sure you “charge” the time and effort required.
Whether you are upskilling the client or dealing with their rudeness, be mindful of the impact on your time and your wellbeing.
Client management is a service you are providing — like products provide customer support.
You should expect a “Return of Investment” on client management by making sure it’s sustainable on your finance and wellbeing or, otherwise, quit the client.
When stress and overwhelm happen, I try to hear a Yoda in my head, that reminds me:
‘When you look at the dark side, careful you must be …
for the dark side looks back.’
Protecting your mental health from clients
Client management at times isn’t easy on me.
The last thought before falling asleep. The first waking up.
It’s stress generating.
Practising mindfulness is helping me.
As the Buddha says, when we get hit by an arrow, we get hit by a second one after giving us even more pain.
“In life, we can’t always control the first arrow. However, the second arrow is our reaction to the first. The second arrow is optional.”
You cannot fully manage difficult clients.
But you can manage how that impacts on your mental health.
It’s not about stop caring about a project, but being mindfully aware of what it’s under our control or influence, and not.
I can try to improve ways of working, upskill clients, gain their trust.
But I need to accept it takes time, and I might fail.
I might not have enough time, expertise and (honestly) interest.
Accept what you don’t have control of, and focus on the positive impact of a project.
What you have most control of is not the success of a project, but your ability to take away something from it.
Sometimes I need to fight with my pride because a project won’t become a beautiful case study. But, as mentioned in the portfolio episode, what matters are the takeaways – they make me a better designer, better at supporting my next client and managing my mental health.
It’s not easy, but I do it by practising patience and compassion.
Like Yoda reminds me:
Patience you must have, my young padawan
But I’m sure your tips and thoughts would help me too.
So let me know how you mindfully support your client, but most of all, manage yourself – which is where you have the most control of.
Subscribe to Design, in Confidence wherever you listen to your podcast.
Or follow me for future transcripts.
Please review, and share it with others.
Tell people why you found this valuable, and that you are a safe space to find support in building their creative confidence.
If you got this far, I’m sure you’re a great listener — which I thank you for.
And now, it’s time to listen to your thoughts.
And remember to thank yourself, for the time you spent to learn, and grow.
